Jon Snow is Harry Potter

Welcome to The Podcast That Drinks and Knows Things’ Drowned Word! The Drowned Word focuses on topics discussed in the most recent episode of the show. Today I’m talking about S07E01 Exposition: The Episode.  

First of all, this is a great episode of the podcast. The panel is wonderful and they do a really good job of analyzing the season premiere. So good a job, in fact, that I don’t feel the need to go in depth on anything serious they discussed. Let’s go in depth on something silly then, shall we?  

Luke compared Jon to Harry Potter after Jon’s somewhat misguided speech at Winterfell. Let’s compare some other Game of Thrones characters and Harry Potter characters. I’ve decided to compare the Houses in GoT to the Houses in Harry Potter and choose one member of each house to also compare.

The obvious place to begin is with House Stark and Gryffindor House. Both are full of brave idiots who get themselves killed, which leads to my first comparison.

Robb Stark is James Potter. Both men are brave but make some questionable decisions: James almost killing Snape (siriusly, what the heck, James?) and Robb actually marrying Talisa even though everyone told him that was DUMB. If Harry Potter was more like Game of Thrones, James would have actually killed Severus and lost an alliance with House Snape.

Let’s move on to my house: Ravenclaw. I’ve chosen not a family, but instead what I think is a fairly obvious comparison: the Maesters. There are many things the two groups do not have in common (like celibacy or homogenous gender), but of course, both groups value knowledge and expertise. Let’s compare Maester Pycelle to everyone’s favorite Ravenclaw, Gilderoy Lockhart!  

Pycelle and Lockhart have more in common than you might first think. Both men have personalities that they have created for the public. Pycelle pretends to be a frail, old man when he is actually anything but, and Lockhart pretends to be a brave, competent wizard when he’s really just a liar and great at one spell. Both men are eventually dispatched – Pycelle is murdered by Qyburn [Editor Luke Addition: Varys in book] and Lockhart accidentally Obliviates himself.

Another easy comparison is, of course, Slytherin and House Lannister. If we’d had some Slytherin characters in Harry Potter as complex as the Lannisters, readers might have appreciated the House way more. I’ve decided to go with Tom Riddle and Tywin Lannister.

Besides the obvious similarity (the letter T, duh), both men are clever, persuasive, and powerful. They each have inherited power: Tywin from the Lannister name and Tom from being the heir of Salazar Slytherin. Tom probably could have learned some tricks from Tywin – ultimately, both men lived to almost the same age, but Tywin still looked handsome when he died.

And finally, Hufflepuff House is obviously very similar to House Bolton.

Just kidding!

Thank you to Benji for this perfect comparison – we’re going with Hufflepuff Nymphadora Tonks and Jaqen H’ghar of the Faceless Men. This is a fairly easy one. Tonks is, of course, a Metamorphmagus, meaning she can change her look at will. Jaqen and the other Faceless Men have the ability to take on new appearances as well. Jaqen is a bit more murderous than Tonks, but as an Auror, Tonks does have the ability to take people out if needed. Aurors and assassins, not so different.

Here are a few more comparisons from your favorite podcasters:

• Severus Snape = Joffrey Baratheon (Luke)
• Fat Friar = Robert Baratheon (Luke)
• Ernie MacMillan = Mace Tyrell (Luke)
• Hannah Abbott = Faceless Man (“She’s no one” – Luke)
• Cedric Diggory = Rickon Stark (“Forgotten about and basically a spare” – Luke)
• Dolores Umbridge = Cersei Lannister (Melissa)
• Dolores Umbridge = High Sparrow (Luke)
• Argus Filch = Walder Frey (“Besides the obvious, he cleans up messes other adults are to afraid to” – Benji)
• Sirius Black = Jamie Lannister (Melissa)
• Sybill Trelawney = Bran Stark (Benji)
• Sybill Trelawney = Melisandre (Melissa)
• Firenze = Bran Stark (Melissa)

And finally, shout out to this wonderful line from the podcast: “Everybody needs a Stab Mitzvah.”

Until next time, thanks for reading The Drowned Word. What is read may never die.